A new year a new goal.....

Alright my amazing followers, it's a new year and with that comes a new challenge, well okay the same challenge but new expectations, I'm sure as you are all aware 2012 was definitely a year of up's and downs, weight was down then went up, was down then went back up. It was a vicious cycle which this year I plan to break. I am using more resources for sure (umm hello pinterest????) and youtube video's to help ramp up my workouts. Brian has been amazing as well! I joined 24 Hour Fitness because unfortunately the small gym in town didn't have everything I was looking for and while I am paying a little more then I was at the other gym I think the extra cost is worth it.  Anyways....One of the video's I really have been following are by Trainer Josh, he has a lot of great video's on YouTube I highly recommend you check them out. So right now my weight is holding steady at 176. My highly reasonable goal is to be down to 125 by July, and for those of us who are horrible at math like me that's only 2lbs a week which is a very easily attainable goal don't you think? I do. I'd like to be ready for Hawaii this year. Yes last year I was down to 160 but after Hawaii I ballooned back up to 176 and I hate it. I only have 1 pair of jeans that fit and with my new job I feel like a slob (even though I don't dress like one) next to the other girls that work there. I want to be proud of my body not ashamed, crossing my arms over my stomach not because i'm upset but because I simply want to hide my muffin top, which btw still happens no matter how loose my jeans are. Well muffin tops be darned i'm going to do my best to get rid of it once and for all, i'm hoping to be able to afford more personal training sessions at 24 Hour since my amazing trainer who got me down to 155 no longer does training :( Well thats it for now! Welcome to 2013~!!

New Gym New Start?

Okay so I got a membership at my local gym but after 2 months i'm realizing it's not the gym for me, they don't have nearly all the equipment I want and they don't have a sauna or anything like that so as part of my Christmas present my boyfriend offered to pay my first and lasts membership costs so that he and I could get a membership at 24 hour fitness, i've been wanting to join for awhile but just didn't have the time or the money andn ow I have both so i'm looking foward to it! currently i'm at 174lbs (ugh) and tomorrow is day 1 of my start at 24 hour fitness I can't wait for the 2 hour workout that is ahead of me~!! (yes I really am excited) stay tuned for more details~!

Ever have one of those days???

So today my boyfriend invited me out to the motorcycle shop in Beaverton where he bought his bike so I can try on jackets and gloves so that when I am A. riding on his bike I won't freeze (hence the gloves, I do have gloves but they are slippery against his gas tank and holding myself up while we are riding is pretty tough) and B. since I am getting a motorcycle early next year I need the proper protective gear. Anyways right now I am up 20lbs since my fall. I am cleared to  go back to the gym but I tell you finding the motivation is just tough when you go 9 months of not working out to finally being able to work out its just hard to find any motivation, I get up super early and so by the time I get home i'm just tired then you add homework into the mix it's just not pretty, plus the gym I joined is closer to home than to work so it's like do I want to drive out of my way to go to the gym (btw let me just preface that unfortunately my job right now stinks, my bills are about $800 a month and I currently only make about $600 after taxes so you can imagine the joy I feel trying to make up that extra $200. So gas is limited (hence the upcoming bike purchase) and for those of you who wonder just how early I get up well on a given day I get up at 4 or 5 am and if I happen to be down in Eugene visiting my boyfriend well then I wake up at 2:45am to be to work at 5 and then I get off anywhere between 11am and 2pm) Anyways i'm getting off subject, so we are at the motorycle shop and i'm trying on Jackets... I go to a Medium which i'm thinking will fit no problem...WRONG because of my lovely chest size (36D) I can't even zip the jacket up past my boobs so I have to go to a Large which thankfully zips but it's a little tight. Now with me and my weightloss even when I was down to 155 my boobs were the same size, now I realize some of you girls are like OMG JEALOUS! but trust me I swear sometimes I buy maternity tops just for the length!!!!!!!! I am constantly having to layer my shirts or stretch them to make them long enough. Plus I am one of those people who carry my weight in my stomach so no matter what I do I have a muffin top in the front and a little on the sides, I do whatever I can to hide this muffin top which I have even when I am not wearing pants!!!! Thankfully i'm more conservative in knowing that I actually have one so if I have pants that unfortunately accentuate this I make sure that I wear a sweater or top that hides it as much as possible. I swear I should start buying jeans like a guy they go by waist and length, i'm 5'3 so pants are always too long or too short.  I once tried on a pair of Buckle Jeans when I was down to 155 and I fell in love and I mean in love they made me feel amazing! LOL they should have for almost $100. My boyfriend told me that he would buy me a pair when I lost a few more lbs (Since I was still losing weight at the time I didn't want to buy a pair too big and just shrink out of them) well needless to say i'm 20 lbs away from where my first goal was and no closer to my Buckle Jeans or Boots that I can actually fit my calves and pair of jeans into (I have very muscular calves and I hate it...) Okay i'm getting off subject again. Anyways it just hit me today...wow I feel fat. and I do i'm at 172.2 right now and when you've gone down to 155 and back up to 172 you can just feel the extra weight everywhere and you can see exactly where it came back onto (lol)  Please help me find the motivation I don't like this right now I miss 155 so bad, I also miss Kwando even though thats not coming back :( I thought about joining 24 hour fitness on top of my other gym in Molalla just so i'd have no excuse to drive or walk the 1 block down to it since it's literally that close to my work but with my paychecks being so small I couldn't even afford the special this month which was AMAZEBALLS.........no intitation fee and it would only be $39 a month ($7 more than my current gym membership) so basically for $78 I could get into 24 and then I could get amazing trainer deals in January so that I could get back on track. The trainer I had at Ballys last year was an ex marine and I have never been worked out so hard, I tried to train with him outside of the gym since I left them due to retarded management and they are a bunch of liars as well. But since I worked 8-5 M-F in Gresham (btw it took me an hour to get home every night) the last thing I wanted to do was workout in the dark and it would take me an hour and a half to get to Milwaukie from my work with traffic. I need a new plan I need motivation I need I need I need........Sorry for my rant but it's been a lonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggggg week, on the bright side i'm never too fat for my nikes or my shoes...There is a plus in this ocean of negatives....Well stay tuned for next week since i'm only working 2 days. Black Friday (yay! not) and Saturday I will have no excuse to not drive the 15 minutes to my gym and workout...something has to change and its not my love for food LOL

I've lost my way.....

I lost my path......this last year has been such a roller coaster of weight loss ups and downs.....down to 155 up to 170 down to 160 and now back up to almost 175, I really just want to cry but crying is for wimps...... I've lost my focus and I need someone to slap me back to reality, I did it once I can do it again....

New Gym

So yesterday I told you how I joined a new gym, well today I went and was not disappointed but for those of you who gym hop like I do you know what I'm talking about! So I got there and I'm looking around and even though I have my fitness routine in my head I completely deviate because when it's your first day in a new gym your too busy trying to figure out what machine does what since most locally owned gyms dont have instructions next to each machine and we all know too well that most of the time we don't know what we are doing unless its a simple machine, good lord there was this one machine there that I'm still scratching my head on it looked more like a transformer than a piece of exercise equipment! (I'll take a pic tomorrow r Wednesday so you can all understand) anyway so I swear I walked around more trying to figure out what machines I could do that would work best with my routine than I did working out (ok not really but it seemed that way) point being that I didn't do my best workout today but I still was sweating liquid awesomeness so I felt good, first time in almost 9 months that I've been on an elliptical so I only did 30 min but let me tell you I felt awesomeness doing 30 min considering I usually do 60 min sets on the eliptical!!! Tomorrow night is Zumba do we will see if it's more Latin or hip hop based, I'm praying it's hip hop based only because I did a Latin based one at Eastside and I swear I popped a hip out of place trying to keep up with the moves, that and I looked like a total RETARD I swear the teacher was looking at me in the mirror think what the heck is that girl doing, because I know I was laughing at the girl til I realized it was me in the mirror. Well that's enough for today stay tuned!

So we meet again??

Ummmm hello where did 2012 go???? I cannot believe that it is Sept 2nd....WOW. So here's a litte update for you all who have noticed I haven't been blogging regularly. Jan I fell and got hurt at work, was off work for almost 2 months and then I was back at work for 3 weeks before I got let go, fast forward a couple months I am back up to 178lbs (EEK!) I was not allowed to work out, I couldn't walk or run very far so basically I was a pile of boringness. Fast forward another couple months....I find out i'm going to Hawaii (woohoo!!) so I manage to lose 18lbs and get down to 160 before I leave in Aug....now It's Sept and i'm holding steady at 163 and i'm like this close to getting off modified work duty and being allowed to work out (if you could see my fingers you would see how close the gap is between them as I am saying "this close") I left my previous gym that I basically signed up for and wasted because I thought i'd be off modified work sooner so yeah I just flushed like $100 down the drain and they don't give refunds (seriously????) So now i'm at new gym thats a lot cheaper and closer to my house. I am starting there on Monday, i'm allowed exericse as tolerated but knowing me and everyone who knows me I like to push the limits. Unfortunately I learned that I can hyper extend my body so when I do manage to injure myself I stay injured a lot longer than normal for my age. Now i'm in good shape considering for years I didn't work out and ate whatever I wanted, My thighs, calves and biceps were rock hard (which I wish my biceps were smaller I totally hate my big arms.) But once I tasted the sweet nector of definition when I was down to 155 I was hooked. Then of course it gets taken away and although I still have some definition I look more like Gumby than Hercules if you get my drift LOL. Lets just say that I am chomping at the bit and I have my workout routine all ready to go, plus I am soooo PUMPED that the new gym offers zumba more than 2x a week, they offer it Mon, Tues, Thurs and Sat!!!!! I'll be fit in no time and I cannot wait to buy my first pair of Buckle jeans....It sucks when you bf has bought 2 pairs of them recently and I still won't try on another pair since last time because I didn't lose more weight I gained.......And I have a feeling that Santa will bring me a pair for Christmas if i'm really good ha ha.....wish me luck tomorrow the liquid awesomeness begins to pour out of my body......

Almost there!

Well I'm at 160 as of this morning so I've lost a total of 16lbs of the almost 20 that I gained after my fall in January, my pain is down to a 4/10 and I'm hoping to be back into the gym very soon!!!!! I'm hoping to lose the final 5lbs before I leave for Hawaii in 5 days but I'll be happy if I just lose inches instead of lbs I've only been able to workout my upper body since my injury but I'm fine with that since its my upper body that I'm most unhappy with mostly my stomach and arms the rest I'm pretty happy with! Triceps are the worst!! I've been working them like crazy trying to get them to tighten up so I don't wave goodbye 2x instead of 1 If you get my drift!! I also dislike my stomach I've always had a gut unfortunately and while it's getting harder it still has a layer of fat on top and I will be amazed when I finally have a flat stomach, I've always had a muffin top and thankfully I'm not one of those people who flaunts it ;) but there is only so much cover up you can do so I try my best to be as flattering as possible atleast it's not a Walmart muffin top he he. It's weird how you can't tell a difference in weight loss when you look in the mirror but in a photo you can! I'm so close to goal #1 of my weightloss once I get back to 155 I will have lost 40lbs again and relost the 20lbs I gained from my injury I believe that is quite a feat if you ask me! Once I reach 155 I will be only 25-30lbs away from my goal weight of 125/130!!!!!!!! Goal #2 is to lose 10lbs by October (this ultimately depends on what my doctor says, I may have to move my timeframe back but that's okay healing takes time!) well I'm off for now thanks for the support!